Time....

So....I am back among the living.  For like a day. Or two.  I have no classes this week...truly a miracle.  I do have to work Black Friday though....uuuugggghhhhh.  So not looking forward to that.  I do not have to work Thanksgiving though so my parents are coming to spend the day with us before I go to bed for an early night(I have to be at work....at MIDNIGHT....AGAIN).  Only 5 more weeks then a normal Monday to Friday schedule.  I cannot wait.  Be prepared for some rambling to follow, and I apologize for the rambling...

I will attempt to catch everyone up(all 4 of you, thank-you for your participation).  I got a new job in September.  I currently am working for Meijer, it isn't great, but it is better than the Hobby Lobby I was at here.  I got put into leadership training two weeks later.  I got promoted a week after that.  I got a raise...roughly two weeks ago.  I have been busy, but busy is good.  Keeps me focused.

I canceled my Facebook account.  Well, I deactivated it.  I can always log right back on if I need to.  Which I have only done once in the last 3 weeks.  I was proud of myself.  Still am.  I figure if all people are doing is gossiping, causing drama, and not being very Christ-like, do I really need to be part of it.  I mean, if it is dragging me down and taking my time up when I should be studying do I really need it?  No, apparently not.  The world hasn't stopped, and I feel just fine without it.  I do miss a few people, but they know how to get in touch with me if they have the time to catch up.  And I know not everyone uses Facebook for gossiping and causing trouble, but I was tired of receiving nasty emails and people not being very nice about things that were none of their business.

We started the Dave Ramsey Financial Peace University.  It has been....exhilarating....exhausting....daunting...and even a tad bit fun.  But it has been very eye-opening.  There are some really surprising things we have learned.  We knew we could save up money and buy the things we wanted, but to have someone reiterate it and give us tools we need to do that has been very nice.  I made the comment to my husband tonight that I wish we could go to France.  He replied..."we can.  We can just buy a canoe and row for the next 26 years", I mean it is a thought, but no.  Not really to interested.  Did make me laugh though....have not been able to laugh easily for awhile. 

The not laughing part is due to some issues with part of my biological family.  I am not willing to change my values and the things my upbringing taught me to make people happy.  There are certain things I find incredibly disrespectful, and being asked to accept them and let them be part of my life is hard for me.  Especially when they go directly against my morals and my faith.  I do not make exceptions on some things.  It was hard.  It is still hard.  I do not think it will get better any time soon.  And honestly, I am okay with it the way it is for now.  I do believe God will work it out if it is meant to work out.  Honestly though, having the relationship out of my life is what is best for my focus.  My husband, school, my faith and my Savior, and my parents, brother and sis-in-law and those two sweet :-) kids are the most important things in my world.  If someone is asking me to put them behind something else...I have issues with that.  And school....that takes way more of my focus than I like.  But God is able.  He can give me the strength and focus that I need.

On anther note, we went to our first MDA Seminar on Saturday.  It was a caregiver seminar.  Apparently November is National Caregiver Month.  And National Adoption Month.  Happy Caregiver and Adoption Month.  Back to my thought train...we learned some very interesting things.  Did you know that their are 66 million caregivers in the United States.   That those 66 million caregivers provide $450 BILLION of services and time for our government and people without pay.  The average caregiver is 48 years old, 2/3 are female, and most provide at least 30 hours of care a week.  That care can be for a disabled parent/child/spouse/sibling, an elderly parent, or a non-disabled person.  A caregiver under the age of 28 who cares for someone with a disability is three times as likely to develop Type 2 Diabetes, heart disease, have a stroke, or die of a stress related illness.  Why...because most caregivers do not take care of their own health.  They do not go to the doctor when they should, which is regularly, they do not take time for themselves, and they just generally do not take care of their health.  It worries me.  For me.  And for all of my friends who are mothers.  And for all the women and men who are caring for sick spouses.  And the list goes on and on.  My husband is on me even more now to take care of myself....guess I should listen huh.

On another note...we did find a support group, or I should say support groups.  Other couples like us, where one has a form of MD and one doesn't.  Couples where there is a spouse who carries more of a burden because their spouse can't.  I don't feel quite so alone now.  I knew their were others like us, like me, out their, but to see them in real life was comforting.  And we got a new doctor too.  I am very excited about that because I honestly detested Chris's doctor.  I knew more about MD than she did.  And I knew she wrote the prescriptions wrong before we even left the parking garage.  I mean who rights a script for a dermal patch to be given inter-dermally...you cannot put a patch under the skin.  Doesn't work like that.  And I was very excited to here that the new doctor is well-known and has a FANTASTIC reputation in the MD world.  I am hoping for great things.

All in all....been a busy but profitable few months.  The year is not done yet so I am sure there is still many more interesting things to come.  Hopefully I will get better about updating my blog....Until then...take care of yourself or else you will not be able to take care of the ones you love.  Stay strong....and focused.

New Beginnings....

If you remember back to my previous post, Strange Events, I was at a cross-roads about where I was headed for college in the fall.  I had everything planned, and then God stepped in.  As they say hindsight is truly 20/20 and now I am incredibly thankful for how everything worked out.  Sometimes I still am amazed that God knows what He is doing.  It is so say to me that after all He has done for me, I still question Him.  You would think I would have learned by now.  But that...is another post for another day.  Back to college.
After it was all said and done, I ask to have my appeal withdrawn.  Why?  I still do not know for sure, though it is more clear now than before, but God laid it in my heart that the Christian College was most definitely not the one for me.  Boy was I ever confused.    I mean, why did God want me to skip the Christian college for a secular community college.  Now....I understand. 
If I were attending the Christian college, I would not be able to work unless it was night shift or weekends.  That would mean no sleep, no family time, and most importantly, no time for Sunday worship or "hubby" time.  I would have had to have chosen, eventually that is, between work and school.  It would not have been pretty.
So off to the community college I went.  I managed to get my FA and Loan documents turned in ONE day before the deadline.  I was able to take my entrance exams, do my orientation, and get most of the classes I wanted.  And that, was truly a God thing.  Most of the fall classes were full in June.  So how I got them can only be attributed to my Heavenly Father.  
And then the waiting game began.  Will they approve my transcript?  Will I get credit for 2 years of school in Texas?  And then the answer came...No.  I was heartbroken.  I laid in bed that night and cried myself to sleep.  I was screaming at God inside wanting to know  why.  I did not understand, and I probably never will, but oh well.  God knows and that has to be enough for me for this life.  I press on...
So school started.  I got my books, and a new computer, and all my supplies, and realized...every class I have this semester is review.  All five of them.  I have taken each before...and then I started to understand a little bit of God's plan.  Not all of it, but a glimpse.  You see, I am going to get my LPN, then go back for my ASN.  Then transfer to another college and get my Masters.  To get my LPN/ASN at my chosen school...you have to have straight A's with a 4.0 gpa.  Otherwise, you can give up before you start.  It is currently the most competitive nursing school in the state.  And one of the most well-regarded.  Guess God did know what He was doing....:-)
Well my 5 classes have started.  I have Introduction to Sociology(3), Introduction to Psychology(3), English Composition(3), First Year Seminar(1), and Anatomy & Physiology 1(3).  The little number after each one...is how many credit hours each is worth.  If you add them all up, that is 13 hours total per week in class.  For Sociology and First Year you double those numbers to get the required study time per week for a total of 8.  For English and Psychology...you triple that number for 18 total(some weeks is less some is more).  And for A&P, well for every hour of lecture you double and for every hour of lab you triple which works out to 10 hours per week.  So total study time per week...36 hours give or take a little.  Plus 13 hours of lecture.  Plus 40 hours for work...89 hours of my week are donated for school and work.  If I were not in the smaller community college...I would never be able to do it.  God knows....and worked all things together for the good of my family and myself.
Oh, and I just got a phone call.  I was just accepted in to the TRIO SSS or TRIO Student Support Services.  Basically, I was one of 300 students accepted each semester(out of 6,000 FT at my local campus).  I feel blessed.  I know have access to FREE tutoring services, Scholarship and FA assistance, Transfer/Academic counseling, Mentoring, Degree specific counseling and prep classes, and many other advantages.  I am so thankful and feel so incredibly blessed right now.  
Well, now you know what I am up to for the next 3(give or take a little) months.  My books are calling my name...I have 5 exams and one paper due this week....

Decisions....

So I have been at a loss for awhile.  The few times I do have time to sit down and blog, I am not sure what to blog about.  I do not know if I should blog about school, about what God is doing in our lives, or if I should blog about all things cooking.  Do I tell our story or do I just not blog at all.

Well the other night I decided that I should just talk about anything that is on my heart.  Sometimes it may be about college, or about God, or about God and College, or about food, or marriage, or family, or adoption.  My adoption story has come full circle and sometimes I think parents of adoptee's need to hear an adopted child's perspective or know that their kids are not the only ones who have questions.  So over the next few days, or maybe just throughout today, I am going to touch on each topic I talked about.  I have not yet figured out how to do tabs, or I would organize my page a little better.  Oh well, at least I am on a learning curve.  Until next time...

News Flash....

In case I didn't mention it....I am adopted.  I support adoption...I support the kids who need the homes.  And yes, I support out-of-country adoptions. I was adopted from within our nations borders; and for years, it broke my heart when people choose to leave the country.  But gradually I am beginning to understand, God has a different path for each and every child(and in country isn't cheap either, but neither is out of country).  Some of us have homes across the street, in the next county, in the next country, or maybe across the nearest ocean.  So, to all the adoptees and their families, GOOD FOR YOU!!!!  And congratulations, you just did the biggest thing that can impact the earth....you have chosen to change a child's life.  Congratulations, welcome to the journey.

Strange Events...

As you may have guessed...I am borrowing a computer for the weekend.  And trust me, this post will be brief.  Probably because I am so frustrated I want to scream. 
Remember that private Christian college where I was attending to get my BSN, well due to an issue with ONE course, I have been denied acceptance into their nursing school, for a mere 5 YEARS.  I am appealing the process so pray for me.  Pray hard. 
I am not totally in a bad place, I did get accepted to a community college, which all though it is MUCH cheaper, I can only get an ASN through them, and then would have to go somewhere else to get my BSN, and then probably somewhere else to get my Masters.  It would be a 9 or 10 year journey(I would be like roughly 36 before I got there), versus a journey of roughly 6 or 7 years...8 at the most.  I hope you grasp my frustration.
In the middle of my vent fest, my husband piped up quietly beside me.  He said "God didn't open all the doors He opened, get you the jobs you got, get you in "your" school that you shouldn't have gotten into(I applied 2 months after the deadline), and continually worked out everything if He didn't have an ultimate purpose in mind.  Maybe He wants you to go through the appeals process to prove to Him that this is what your heart really desires.  Or maybe He is wanting to see if you are going to praise him no matter what.  Or maybe He wants to see how hard your desire to attain the dreams HE gave you is.  You never know what He is doing...remember, His ways aren't ours."  I was sitting there not wanting to hear that, but I knew I needed to.  I knew he was simply speaking to me what God was laying on his heart, and that as usual, he is my calming voice of reason. 
So, we are waiting.  Patiently, him more than me, but I am getting there.

Changes In The Air....

There are changes in the air...exciting changes, scary changes, costly changes.  I got accepted into my college of choice.  Now, as exciting as it is, I am very overwhelmed. 
Keep in mind the community college I attended before our move cost approximately $18,586 a year.  That works out to a little more than $9,293 a semester.  The new private Christian college I am starting in the fall, $36,348 a year.  That is a grand total of...(insert drum roll please) $18,174 a semester.  My Pell grant and financial aid comes to a grand total of $17, 500 A YEAR.  As you can see, there is a slight discrepancy in those numbers. My stress level on realizing the breadth of the discrepancy...was astronomical.  I almost, ALMOST cried. 
I chose instead to sit down and ask God if He knew what He was doing.  I heard Him laugh(in my head of course) and remind me that he is in control.  So please, please pray for my/our financial needs. 
There are all kinds of grants, loans, etc. I can apply for, but I am still very worried.  Besides the tuition and fees thing, I am also still waiting on acceptance into the nursing program...pray hard people, God is going to have to do mega string pulling for this to happen.  I know God is in control, but it is still a frightening/exciting change. 
On a whole other note, I had to explain the whole "blog" thing to my husband this morning.  I showed him one of my favorites, Life With A Family, to explain.  He was impressed, and actually sat and read over my shoulder for quite some time....who knows, maybe I will get a co-blogger yet!!

Issues In Computer Land....

You will have to excuse my extended absence.  My computer "died" on me about two weeks ago, and until I have been working for a while we simply don't have the money to fix it.  I don't have much time(I am borrowing a friends computer) but I wanted to ask for prayer.  I am pretty sure no one reads this, but that is okay.  God knows my heart and putting my words on "paper" helps me feel a little better.  We need prayer.  We are looking for a new church, so please keep us lifted up.  I appreciate it, we appreciate it.  Blessings to your day....